- You must be joking
So, last night, the darling girlfriend and I met da fellas at the tux shop to pick up our prom attire. And can I just tell you that it is a thousand times more embarassing to be a woman being fitted for a tux than it is to go shopping for sex toys? Just saying. Anyhoo, met the girls, did the tux thing, then we all went to dinner, then out for a few drinks.
We get to the bar, have to wait 15 minutes for them to open the damn doors, then commence to drnking and talking about sex. Typical night out. And THEN, bout 5 drinks into the evening, darling girlfriend leans over and says "that guy in the red Tshirt keeps looking at me. Ew." I think nothing of it, till 10 minutes later he comes over and LICKS MY GIRLFRIENDS TOES. No, really, this freaky sick fuck comes over and leans down, we're thinking he's picking something up off the floor. And then he grabs my woman's ankle and licks her toes. Then looks up, says "thank you" and proceeds on to the bathroom. Takes about 10 seconds for it to sink in, and then girlfriend goes off. Me an the girls are dumbfounded. Cause really. I mean, I got nothing against foot fetish types, but helloo, number 1- stay the fuck out of gay bars unless you're lickin boy foot, and number 2- stay the fuck away from my woman. And find a fucking date to lick, you sick twisted bastard.
Now, you would assume, as I did, that the owner of the bar (who is a lesbian, BTW), would have a thought process that goes something like this- "Hmmm... there's a group of 4 lesbians in my bar spending money.... they're here quite a bit... perhaps I should throw this jackass out, seeing as how he's STRAIGHT and LICKS PEOPLE'S TOES, and I don't want to piss off my regulars." But is that whay she thinks? Oh no. She takes him aside and explains to him that it isn't nice to lick people without permission. And he goes back and sits at the bar. And apparently I'm supposed to be ok with that. Mind you, she told me 5 minutes before that this dickhead did the same thing to another woman last week. What. The. Fuck.
So, I need a new bar. Fuck the Longbada. I feel safer in a straight bar. Least they woulda thrown toe licker out. Unfuckingbelievable.