Saturday, August 07, 2004

Good Times!
So, Thursday I stayed at Kev's house cuz he needed to drop his car off to get inspected Friday. We did the usual Tbird, Images, Pegs thing, nothing worth noting, crashed at his place and was actually up and moving at 7am Friday. 7. am. Yeah. So we drop his car off and go back to his place. Too awake to get anymore sleep, so we decide to go to the big gay eat n park for breakfast. I should note that the diner itself isn't gay, just happens to be in the the part of town with the highest gay population. So anyways, had breakfast and walked down to the gay store. I bought way too much stuff. I got a ring with a black triangle inlay, a Tshirt, and a bunch of anti-bush stickers and pins. I so know you're jealous of the shirt. Hee. After shopping, we went to visit Josh and Ursala, then back to kev's, watched a movie, got his car and I headed home.

Napped, showered, got purtied up and was back at Kevs at 9. Had some dinner, then off to Donnys. Donnys sucked big. Stayed for 1 drink, which we chugged, then went to True. True is a new bar/coffee shop/cafe type place in the North Side. I'd been told it was expensive and yuppie. Which it is, kinda, but in a non pretentious kinda way and we freaking LOVED it. So nice to hang in a classy bar. All the bars downtown make ya wonder why your feet are stickin to the floor, if ya know what I mean. So yeah, a nice, clean, well decorated place is cool. Theres no smoking inside, which I actually liked. They do have a really cute patio set up in back for the smokers. Totally a great date place. Yep. Rocked.

So Eth calls about 11, he's been out since 2 and he's with some girl that thinks I'm cute, and they're goin to the Eagle, blah blah. We hang with some of Kev's friends till 12, then off to the Eagle. Of course 5 minutes after we get there, they wanna go to Pegs, so I chug my 2 beers and off we go. Oh, and the girl was cute and sending off those major flirt vibes, but I didn't much care. Cuz who needs the headache. And besides, she was cute but slightly creepy. Don't know why.

So, get to Pegs, me and Kev IMMEDIATELY hit the dance floor. I'm checkin out some visor wearing girl an gettin checked out in return. Always fun. Boogie a bit, then hit the bar. Shots. Beers. More dancing. We lost the rest of the crew. So me and Kev are dancing with these 2 straight girls and their gay boy, and some guy just comes up, grabs me and starts dancing with me. Like boy/girl/follow my lead dancing. Which I'm usually not good at, but he must rock cuz I could actually follow him. SO MUCH FUN! Seriously. People were like watching us an shit. His name was Tony. Love me some Tony! We boogie till they turn the lights on, then off to afterhours. Of course.

Standing in line at afterhours, someone grabs my ass. Was a boy, of course. We start chattin, Kev likes his friend, so we're all hangin and dancin and havin a good time. And drinkin, of course, cuz hell its already 2:30, why stop now? We're all dancin and this boy comes up and starts dancin with me. Well, sort of dancing. More like just kinda swaying. You could tell he was really not feeling at ease ya know? So I grab him and try to get him to shake it. Told him the secret to dancing is to not give a rat's ass what people think. He tells me that he's in a band and is a breakdancer and used to run raves and stuff. Very cool, but very shy kinda guy. I did have him moving by the end of the night tho. He could shake it, lemme tell ya. So we all boogie till they kick us out. Oh, and I got my pic taken for some DJ websitey thing. Me, ass grabby boy and breakdancer boy. Woot.

We leave, stand outside talkin to the assgrabber and friend for awhile, then finally get to the car and leave. Drive past said boys on the way- theyre looking frazzled so we stop to see if they're ok. Their car got towed, so o course, we're all hop in and took em to Kevs. I decide to head home, so jump in the Blazer and off I go. Forgetting that the tunnels are closed. So yeah, rolled in round 5am. Boo ya. Good times!

Thursday, August 05, 2004

Raised by Heathens
or My Mom Rocks Da House Yo!

I came out to my mother almost 10 years ago. I had been sneaking off to the local gay bar and lying about it, and one night a combination of alcohol and guilt did me in and I finally just came out and said it. "Mom, I'm gay."

There are few things that can inspire more fear in the hearts of homos than the thought of coming out. We run the risk of losing our families. Friends. Homes. Sometimes our lives.

Mom took the news pretty well. She didn't gather me in a big hug and tell me everything was ok, but she didn't kick my ass out on the street either, so I was a happy girl. There was no heart to heart about the homo lifestyle. I avoided the topic as much as possible. I figured I told her, she knows, no reason to rub her face in it right? Right.

Things were a little tense between us for awhile. Ya see, I hadn't really come out of the closet. I had just kinda poked my head out. I still lived pretty secretly. Didn't mention any dates I may have had, or girlfriends for that matter. Every once in awhile I would nervously relay an amusing anectdote from the bar, but never, ever did they directly discuss the fact that I'm queer. Or even queerness in general. We followed the don't ask, don't tell policy very well.

One afternoon, mom and I were on our way to visit my sister. Now sis and mom have never gotten along. Ever. They're like oil and water, those two. I've never seen anyone irritate my mother so completly in such a short amount of time with apparently no effort whatsoever. So, on the way to sis' place, I jokingly say "Well ya know, the gay bar is right down the street, we can always stop for a beer on the way home. Ya know you're gonna need one. ha ha." Mom snickers, says nothing. Fast forward a few hours. On the way back from sis', mom says "So where's this bar at?" Oh shit! That was a JOKE!! I can't take my MOTHER to a GAY BAR! "Uh, um, its down there. On the left."

We pull up to the curb and get out of the car. I'm pretty much dying. Um yeah. Mom. Gay bar. Can't be good. But I'm pretty much stuck with it, so I take a deep breath and off we go. Open the door, and I see to my great relief that the bars damn near empty. Woot. I introduce mom to the bartender (turns out they knew each other), we order some beers, and out of nowhere my friends Amy and Gina tackle me. Apparently they were in the bathroom when we arrived.
"Oh! Hey! Guys, um, this is my mom. My MOM! Yeah, um, mom, this is, um, Amy and Gina."
I'm completely freaked out. Not only is my mom in a queer bar, but she has just witnessed her youngest, the baby, the good one, publicly mauled by lesbians. Mom, on the other hand, couldn't give two shits. She's all chattin with the bartender and the girls, drinking her beer, havin a good ol time.

I finally managed to calm down, after pounding a few beers and realizing the my mother wasn't freaking out so why the hell should I? I didn't even spaz when mom got checked out. "You're her mom? Dayumn girl you look GOOD!" Well, I didn't totally spaz anyways. We hung out for a couple hours, watched some football, and that was it.

After the big homo bar experience, I was a little more open. Brought girlfriends home and intro'd them to the folks. Slowly the closet door swung open, sometimes cuz I was pushing it, sometimes cuz mom was pulling it. Now its like there never was a closet.

I don't see the girls from the old bar too often anymore. But when I do, we still talk about the time my mom came to the queer bar. Ayup. Mom rocks.