Thursday, April 22, 2004

I believe I may have found my heterosexual counterpart. Meet Breakup Babe. We so need to do coffee.

Wednesday, April 21, 2004

Be a doll and sign me up for that first option would ya?

courtesy of engrish.com

You're Leggy Bettie...you may be tall or short but
either way you seem to make the guys swoon and
the girls jealous and girls think of you as a
"slut" or "bitch". Again,
you're beautiful, they're not...right?


Which Bettie Page Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Shhhhhhhhh!

Today is the Day of Silence. For those of you not familiar, it is a student led day of action where supporters take a day long vow of silence to protest the silencing experienced by LGBT students. Pretty fuckin cool. I can't imagine something like that goin on when I was in high school. Might as well wear a Tshirt that says "Please kick my ass". So kudos to the students participating. Y'all are making more of a difference than you realize. The times, they are a'changin!

Tuesday, April 20, 2004

Fox can kiss my lily white feminist ass
I was randomly flipping through channels last night and was reminded that I have a long overdue rant to post. Oh yes. The subject of todays rant is the new reality show The Swan. Have ya heard of it? Heres a lil synopsis from the site:

THE SWAN offers women the incredible opportunity to undergo physical, mental and emotional transformations with the help of a team of experts. Contestants must go through an intensive “boot camp” of exercise, diet, therapy and inspiration to achieve their goals. Each week feathers will fly as the inevitable pecking order emerges. Those not up to the challenge are sent home. Those who are will go on to compete in a pageant for a chance to become “The Ultimate Swan.”

Each contestant has been assigned a panel of specialists -- a coach, therapist, trainer, cosmetic surgeons and a dentist -- who together have designed the perfect individually tailored program for her. The contestants’ work ethic, growth and achievement will be monitored. The final reveal at the end of each episode will be especially dramatic because it will be the first time that contestants will be permitted to see themselves in a mirror during the three-month transformation process. Two women will be featured every week and at the episode’s conclusion, one will go home and one will be selected to move on to the 1st Annual Swan Pageant.

In other words, they are taking "ugly ducklings" (meaning average looking women), hacking them up and putting them back together in such a way as to be more pleasing to the (male) eye. And then they get to compete in a pagent. Cuz thats good entertainment! These women have obviously not been told they aren't attractive nearly enough. Shit no! Lets put them through 3 months of mental, physical and emotional hell, parade them on stage like trained monkeys, and then deliver the final blow by telling them "Hey, ya know what? Even with the rhinoplasty, liposuction, boob job, extensions, exercise, caps, etc... you STILL aren't good enough. Sorry. She's hotter than you. Have a nice life."

It is argued that this process of "rebuilding" gives these women a greater self esteem. No kidding. The problem is that they lacked self esteem to begin with. We are force fed unrealistic images from birth. Barbie anyone? Hullo! It is no wonder women are willing to mutilate themselves. Literally. (do a little research on cutting and self injury. Almost always practiced by girls.) I have been on this earth for 32 years. In that time, I have met some amazingly beautiful, intelligent, talented women. I can't name one that was satisfied with her appearance. Not one. Including me.

Others will argue that men are judged by appearance too. Can't possibly be a sexist thing. Right. I could probably name at least 5 female models off the top of my head. And I avoid typical women's magazines. I can't think of one male model. Not one. Look at the magazine rack next time you go to the store. What do you see? "Perfect" women. And you know whats really sad? THOSE women don't measure up either! Its not enough to be 5'11, 117 pounds, etc etc. Nope. Gotta be airbrushed. Sorry Naomi, ya just don't make the cut. It is estimated that up to 10% of the young women in America suffer from an eating disorder. Of all people with an eating disorder, between 90 and 95% are women. Why do ya think that is? Do a search for diet sites and look at the pictures they use in their ads. How many men do you see?

So attention Fox executives and related advertisers. I know you would really like me to spend time with you and check out your wares. But I'm sorry. I just don't find you attractive.

Sunday, April 18, 2004

Well the Bday celebration is complete for this year. Was a roaring sucess if I do say so myself. Went to Images with Eth and Stevo on Thursday. Ama surprised me by coming down to join the festivities. :o) Dr. Mike showed a little after Ama got there, and we all headede to 80s night. Much fun. Tho I lost $60 somewhere along the line. Ah well. Was not gonnaa put a damper on my evening, I'll tell ya that much. After 80s, went back to Images. Saw Alan and Coz (the bartender at the Z), and Jimmy and his boy, and Vern, and bunches of other peeps that I don't really remember lol. Was a little distracted I guess. So shoot me. Heh. So anyways, yeas, much much fun was had. Got up way too early Friday. Went to breakfast with Eth an Stevo, then me an Eth went to get our uber cool matching Bday tattoos. Woot woot! They turned our really well. Hurts like a bitch today tho, I must say. Ah, the price we pay for beauty. Post tattoo, went to see Amy and Barb, then stopped at the Z, but it was closed so said fuck it, went back to my place and napped.

Friday night we met the gals at Donnys. Ama couldn't make it cuz she was feelin under the weather. Some asshat gave her a cold. No acounting for some people I guess ;o) Got uber trashed at Donnys. So Co an coke in the tall glasses will mess yo ass up I tell you what. Specially when they are free and plentiful. The girls got me way way cool presents. Cuz they rock. Dig it- I got a SpongeBob T that says Booyah!, gay pride rolling papers (for tobacco only of course, Mr. Big Brother. Sir.), a way cool hey chain from London that will also open my beers (always good to have), and the coolest of the cool, best of the best, most awseome present of all............. a GirlyDyke decal for the Butchmobile! Oh hell yes! So, many drinks and laughs are had at Donnys, then we decide in our drunken state that a trip to the Z is in order. So, into the car we go, after a chat with Ama. Well mostly a Smouse chat with Ama, cuz my stupid drunken ass left all my booty behind the upstairs bar. Oh, and an aside- Beth the bitchy bartender was very pleasant. Had to make a note cuz it happens so rarely, lol. NE ways. off to the Z we go. Eth calls me halfway there to inform me that the ex is in fact at the bar. Joy. Get to the Z, order some shots and beers. Woot woot. The ex is there. She has a mullet now. *snicker* A mullet. Krys. With a mullet. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *snort* K, so yeah. Saw Lou from the old old bar days. Damn but he looked old. Pam and Gina were there. Talked to Gina for a bit. Was nice, we haven't talked but once or twice shince she and Amy broke up. Krys and the girls had what must have been quite an interesting conversation, lol. I'll get details vian Monday morning email ;o) So more drinkin and being loud and such, blah blah blah. Mostly a blurr, lol. Krys did tell me happy birthday before I left tho. Yeah thanks. Off to home we go. Get the whole way to Export, we're maybe a mile from my house, and there are a bunch of cops in the middle of the road with flashlights looking for something. Of course, being the drunkards we were, me and Eth kinda freak. I'm chainsmoking and diggin in my pocket for breath strips just in case, but all good, they wave us past. Thanks Occifer! One follows us the whole way to my place, but doesnt stop, so aaallllll good, lol. Get in the house, have some pizza, passed out.

Saturday Ama came over to watch movies and be babied a bit, as she was still feeling icky. I made her some chicken soup (homemade I might add), got some orange juice and movies and hung out. Had a very good evening. Think I got some points for my caretaking skill ;o) Go me!

Today went to moms for dinner and such. Was kinda in a fog all day. Uber tired. Long weekend, lol. But much with the rockin. Oh yeah. Very cool Bday.